So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
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Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
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I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
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