On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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