I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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