I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
