he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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