Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
