Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Randomize
