Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
