Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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