The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
