at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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