Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
