Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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