Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Randomize
