I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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