How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
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This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
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I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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