Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Don't EVER smell your tampon
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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