with your own penis?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
