Texts From Last Night

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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school

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  (304): they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school http://tfl.nu/joeo
  Replies (19) Good night (4094) Bad night (729)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I knew I liked you

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  (202): I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later (410): I knew I liked you http://tfl.nu/yvq5
  Replies (37) Good night (4341) Bad night (475)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.

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  (603): Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good. http://tfl.nu/mw2h
  Replies (26) Good night (6265) Bad night (484)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos

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  (512): watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos http://tfl.nu/z3bc
  Replies (17) Good night (8066) Bad night (1240)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  yo everyone went to the hospital last night

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  (401): yo everyone went to the hospital last night http://tfl.nu/d0a6
  Replies (22) Good night (1950) Bad night (4782)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  But I thought everyone had breakup sex?

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  (703): But I thought everyone had breakup sex? http://tfl.nu/04j7
  Replies (24) Good night (5112) Bad night (1477)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.

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  (440): i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me. http://tfl.nu/a0ta
  Replies (13) Good night (3234) Bad night (822)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.

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  (931): How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you. http://tfl.nu/giys
  Replies (7) Good night (3326) Bad night (1152)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...

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  (405): please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin... http://tfl.nu/m01o
  Replies (2) Good night (580) Bad night (1948)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.

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  (301): I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had. http://tfl.nu/epuv
  Replies (5) Good night (929) Bad night (406)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.

  (1-360): View more from Washington

  It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.

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  (360): I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance. (1-360): It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot. http://tfl.nu/be8l
  Replies (3) Good night (1585) Bad night (471)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.

  (1-512): View more from Texas

  Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?

  (512): View more from Texas

  It was just one of those nights, man.

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  (512): I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something. (1-512): Why was his mouth around your nose anyways? (512): It was just one of those nights, man. http://tfl.nu/4s6y
  Replies (2) Good night (361) Bad night (609)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?

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  (+44): Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today? http://tfl.nu/cfiq
  Replies (2) Good night (550) Bad night (536)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.

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  (304): I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation. http://tfl.nu/s759
  Replies (6) Good night (1106) Bad night (236)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.

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  (612): My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly. http://tfl.nu/orbs
  Replies (0) Good night (336) Bad night (202)

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