Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize