So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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