Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
