i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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