either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
