Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
