ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Your tits are I can't wait for
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
This is the high leading the old right now
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize
