i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Your shirt... Was in my pants
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
We need to get me chipped asap
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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