Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
How external is "for external use only"?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Randomize
