Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?