Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome http://tfl.nu/8iag
  Replies (4) Good night (1570) Bad night (552)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide http://tfl.nu/gj7h
  Replies (19) Good night (710) Bad night (3751)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever? http://tfl.nu/bljl
  Replies (88) Good night (5638) Bad night (746)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too. http://tfl.nu/fqh3
  Replies (3) Good night (3469) Bad night (1065)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad. http://tfl.nu/jajh
  Replies (5) Good night (812) Bad night (5369)
• Favorite

  (226): View more from Ontario

  This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (226): This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex http://tfl.nu/70co
  Replies (7) Good night (1878) Bad night (1016)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style. http://tfl.nu/0udf
  Replies (6) Good night (2079) Bad night (1027)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated. http://tfl.nu/dk0w
  Replies (11) Good night (1809) Bad night (919)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time. http://tfl.nu/shdn
  Replies (13) Good night (514) Bad night (1594)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  no way

  (519): View more from Ontario

  that's when i decided you were gonna be okay

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese" (1-519): no way (519): that's when i decided you were gonna be okay http://tfl.nu/clro
  Replies (1) Good night (1493) Bad night (443)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair http://tfl.nu/llhv
  Replies (1) Good night (391) Bad night (847)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into http://tfl.nu/0v44
  Replies (1) Good night (288) Bad night (821)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real. http://tfl.nu/5379
  Replies (10) Good night (2330) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert. http://tfl.nu/zbuo
  Replies (1) Good night (309) Bad night (211)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents. http://tfl.nu/qe34
  Replies (2) Good night (559) Bad night (243)

Randomize