Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Randomize
Follow @tfln