now i know why i became what i already was.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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