Sry I called you an 8
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
