I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I'm bleeding and have questions
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
