How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
