so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
last night I used snow as a chaser
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
