I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
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You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
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Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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