Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
