things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
