mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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