in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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