At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
