Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Sexist Restaurant Owner Tells Woman To ‘Keep Her Legs Open’ After Firing Her
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
19 True Stories So Scary You May Never Turn The Lights Off Again
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes