he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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