sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
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So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
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Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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