We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
