so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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