Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs

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(313): Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs http://tfl.nu/nept

Replies (12) Good night (2938) Bad night (1033)
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(867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.

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(867): Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes. http://tfl.nu/k4jj

Replies (13) Good night (2625) Bad night (1153)
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(720): View more from Colorado

What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to

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(720): What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to http://tfl.nu/xbm0

Replies (33) Good night (1728) Bad night (4449)
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(208): View more from Idaho

just looked at his mug shot... not really my type

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(208): just looked at his mug shot... not really my type http://tfl.nu/kmub

Replies (5) Good night (884) Bad night (4188)
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(703): View more from Virginia

How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist

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(703): How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist http://tfl.nu/hzre

Replies (51) Good night (24558) Bad night (1887)
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(636): View more from Missouri

I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand

(816): View more from Missouri

team rage. no explanation necessary

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(636): I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand (816): team rage. no explanation necessary http://tfl.nu/mquv

Replies (2) Good night (1884) Bad night (3148)
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(253): View more from Washington

No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions

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(253): No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions http://tfl.nu/59zh

Replies (11) Good night (2389) Bad night (876)
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(847): View more from Illinois

If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think

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(847): If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think http://tfl.nu/90ww

Replies (8) Good night (2416) Bad night (648)
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(630): View more from Illinois

I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead

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(630): I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead http://tfl.nu/lnf3

Replies (8) Good night (2583) Bad night (521)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I need moral support for this bender

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(203): I need moral support for this bender http://tfl.nu/bzwm

Replies (3) Good night (818) Bad night (592)
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(563): View more from Iowa

Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!

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(563): Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW! http://tfl.nu/5pvv

Replies (3) Good night (725) Bad night (1096)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"

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(715): He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl" http://tfl.nu/l2de

Replies (18) Good night (551) Bad night (3078)
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(315): View more from New York

My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?

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(315): My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero? http://tfl.nu/se5g

Replies (5) Good night (1534) Bad night (417)
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(330): View more from Ohio

(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)

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(330): (This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office) http://tfl.nu/5fmc

Replies (9) Good night (799) Bad night (326)
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(301): View more from Maryland

All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"

(301): View more from Maryland

I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point

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(301): All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!" (301): I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point http://tfl.nu/5hj0

Replies (1) Good night (617) Bad night (283)

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