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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  1:48 am: your uglier

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• (315): View more from New York

  Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.

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• (650): View more from California

  I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (315): View more from New York

  someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.

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• (850): View more from Florida

  Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.

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• (212): View more from New York

  Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight

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