My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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