Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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