its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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