I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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