If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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